#387: sorry. it's just more about me.

tagged by dana.

4 things I did today:
1) researched civil ceremonies. #*!@)#@($)(@*#!@%($%!!!
2) talked to mama.
3) watched the hills on dvr while eating lunch. (what is UP with the pratts? LC isn't having it with steph's lies so i'm not too worried about that. but heidi? is she that stupid? how does she put up with spencer treating her family the way he treats them. even if it's all for good t.v., watching heidi's mom cry tore me up.)
4) screamed for 30 seconds. (interview this thursday. we. shall. see.)

4 things on my to do list:
1) cook for my fiance and sister tonight.
2) call 3000000 more restaurants. p.s. i've been following up on your suggestions and will share what i find.
3) go to the gym. you know, one of these days.
4) finish unpacking the odds and ends. you know, eventually.

4 of my guiltiest pleasures:
1) um. the hills.
2) coffee. lots and lots of it.
3) fried foods. any kind.
4) perezhilton.com / US weekly (they're kind of one and the same, right?)

4 random facts about me:
1) favorite book = the fountainhead.
2) favorite movie = love actually. and pride and prejudice. and usual suspects. and that movie with ed norton and richard gere. when ed norton starts clapping at the end, it's like whoa nells.
3) favorite meal = mastro's bone-in ribeye.
4) favorite drink = vodka tonic.

i tag...thou.

#386: ...or both?

i just had another nightmare about our wedding.

we never rehearsed, we were frantically writing our vows up until we were dragged to the church pews to take our seats before the ceremony (???), the ceremony overlapped with an actual church service, our wedding was almost forgotten and the congregation was told to leave and then to come back again, and after it was over, i begged of everyone "could we pleeeease do it over? i didn't get to walk down the aisle.." and no one would listen.

wow. lonely world, these wedding nightmares.

**********************************************************

if you couldn't tell, i walked away from my job in finance. and in doing so, i also walked away from medical insurance, dental insurance, worker's comp, paid leave, etc.

and i feel nekkid.

and although it's rather exhilarating to be freeeeee from the clutches of an industry i really could care less about, i also feel apprehensive and irresponsible at the thought of not being covered, insurance wise (among other things).

so like in any partnership, the fiance and i thoroughly discussed (for about 5 minutes) what we should do. and we've decided to...

ELOPE.

egads. i know. but wait. we're not going to just elope. we're going to elope FIRST. we'd legitimize our marriage on paper and with a civil ceremony...and still have our 'wedding' next year (which is, as of now, i think going to happen in May. emphasis on 'as of now' and 'i think'.)

first and foremost, we'd be ridding ourselves from most of the anxiousness we feel in wanting to get married like Right. Now. remember how we considered november dates and february dates? it's because we really do just want to be married. we've flip flopped on the dates a million times, trying to find reasons to get married sooner rather than later. so eloping first would...offer us some relaxation in that regard. we could focus on the 'family' and 'celebration' part of the wedding as opposed to the 'getting married' part. is that weird?

second, we'd be married. WE'D BE MARRIED! (i guess this would be an extension of the first point...)

third, i would no longer be nekkid.

i think i heard the word "perfect" from the fiance at some point during our talk. i also asked my mom and she was 110% for it. i discussed with friends and they were fully supportive...and even suggested that we ask our photog to photograph the civil ceremony in lieu of our 'engagement' pics (which i think is brillz because i never really saw the point of having engagement pics - separate post about that coming up soon).

so. as strange as it may sound, it looks like we're doing both, my friends. eloping + hosting a wedding. it just works for us...and i can't tell you how excited and happy i am.

1) which date would you use for the anniversary? i think i'm going to use the wedding date, not the eloping date. unless convinced otherwise.

2) i will be sporting a dress from my own collection of dresses. but it doesn't hurt to imagine what it'd feel like to get civilly married in one of these:


via perfect bound.


via ruby pr.


via style.com.

#385: talent within reach.

travis hoehne


enluce photography


brian khang


eight 20 photography


marlin munoz

courtesy:
weddingbee board #1
weddingbee board #2

and for you seattle brides:

jenny jimenez

#384: broke-ass brillz.

hey. here's a thought. why not extend the life of all the stuffs from your one-day affair and at the same time save some coin.

read more from miss broke ass bride.

#383: going for dim.

i was really bummed when father's office said 'no'. it literally would have been perfect. PERFECT. amazing food, fun atmosphere, upscale casual, budget friendly-er than your next door 4-course sit down restaurant (or so i would imagine since we never even got the chance to talk numbers...).

and...unconventional.

remind you of anyone?

but at this point, i need to get over it because it's just not going to happen. we have 6 nieces and nephews attending who are all under the age of 8 and a few cousins who are in their first years of college.

and, perhaps most importantly, my brother, who is THE golden apple of mine eyeseth, at age 12. {long story short, he was an 'accident' for my parents who'd been married for close to 20 years and had already raised 2 teen-aged daughters by then. it's kind of really awesome and ever so slightly gross at the same time.}

and our motto is: family first.

so now i'm going down the path of researching restaurants. nothing too pricey of course...but a place that could possibly offer a similar vibe. you know, fun and dimly-lit...but at the same time ok with the under aged.

with my trusty zagat in hand, i contacted the following places. i'll let you know what they tell me.

p.s. i'm hoping they don't tell me the minimum for a saturday buyout is $20,000 to 30,000 as did cafe del rey. lord.

p.p.s. all you LA'ers, of course your suggestions are welcome.


luna park.


fraiche.


rush street.

#382: i'm not a librarian.

but these are really cute...and DIY-able. i'd love to incorporate these somehow...except we'd probably confuse our guests by having something at our wedding that is seemingly...intellectual.


via sarah k. chen.

#381: are you in seattle?

seattle-based silent auction event to benefit the making memories foundation.

click here for more info.

{thanks eliza for the heads up!}

#380: sleepless in seattle...in new york.

"Condé Nast's Brides.com and The Empire State Building today announced the call for entry to couples who wish to be wed at the Empire State Building. Fourteen lucky couples will be selected to exchange vows at this legendary landmark on the most romantic day of the year, February 14 -- better known as Valentine's Day. This is the only time of year that the building opens its doors for marriages."


get deets and enter here.

#379: what's the point of having cake if you can't eat it too?

things i've been doing lately:

1) driving everyone nuts (though they're all too kind to tell me to my face). "we're getting hitched in april!" "oh wait, make that february!" "ahhh...ok, may!" "um...maybe november?" "uhhhhhh...back to february or may..."

self: please STFU.

2) getting (pushed) off track. i didn't think i'd do this when i earnestly began searching for a reception venue but most of the places i've contacted really aren't that far off the road-frequently-traveled-by-brides (ok, fine, i've only received an estimate from one place so far but still...it ceremoniously ripped my budget to shreds...). which means they're all rather expensive. which means i've also been...

3) driving myself nuts trying to hold tight to this budget whilst also clinging to the Big Vision with ALL SIGNS pointing to IMPOSSIBLE.

as a result, and to point out the obvious, the venue search has been an utter failure. meh, i should rephrase that. finding a venue that we like, that we think our guests would like, all the while sticking to my $10,000 goal...has been mindbendingly difficult and disappointing.

i feel like i've looked for so long for "unique venues" (read: venues not on the road-frequently-traveled-by-brides thus able to make friends with my budget) or at least unique ways in order to find unique venues. but over the past couple of months, i've somehow come full circle back to popular wedding venues...which translates to EXPENSIVE...which translates to WILL BREAK MY BUDGET AND TAKE MY ARMS AND LEGS. which is so far away from where i thought i'd be. which has been making me anxious about our budget.

what am i doing. i can't pull this off. aim for the stars and at least reach the moon? not so much, apparently.

and the fiance has even said to me on several occasions while witnessing the struggle:
hey...maybe TTO could stand for..."twenty thousand only"...? yeah? deal or no deal?

NO DEAL! HA HA HA! you're so silly!!!...

but seriously? i've allowed myself to wonder as of late...would it BE so wrong to break the ceiling juuuuust a little bit? like...by 100%?

but i don't want to! {cue 'cry me a river' here}

so...what am i doing wrong? and why do i constantly feel like my mind keeps battling itself? (as evidenced by the scarily-all-over-the-place-complete-with-multiple-voices episode you just read above...)

enter reader crafty beaver with her comment:
Seems to me that a lot of heartache comes NOT from trying to throw a great wedding and party on $10K (or whatever your personal number is), but from trying to throw the $50K wedding in all the pictures on $10K.

wait a minute. wait a minute. so what you're saying is...

i can't throw a $50k wedding for $10k.

man, why have i been driving myself nutso's when it's really that simple?

i can't have my cake and eat it too. unless i change the type of cake i want...in which case i may end up getting and eating the best cake of my freaking life. and now that i realize that and (key word coming up...) ACCEPT it...i'm feeling quite motivated again.

first step: to revisit my priorities. post to come shortly.

p.s. bloggers-you-love-to-read meg and guilty also gave me some juice with their recent posts.

p.p.s. um. i love all ya'll.

#378: glamour closet.

after he poppeth'd the question, i figured i'd try on dresses. for fun. alone.

so i did.

i used to walk by glamour closet everyday on my way to work and knew it was a sample sale store (read: not a high end couture boutique). so i dropped in unannounced (which is the way they like it. walk-ins only!) and tried on 6 or 7 dresses. was it fun? yes. did i think i'd buy a dress there? no. they carry name brand designer dresses and though they're a fraction of the retail cost, i considered the price too high-brow for me.

but that was before i went ahead and bought my dress at an amy kuschel sample sale. for what i paid for my dress, i could have seriously considered purchasing a dress from GC.

and with their 'extra 20% off all dresses' sale about to start, that little thing called 'buyer's remorse' is creeping up on me.

if you're in SF, check them out. nothing to lose and the staff is uberly kind and helpful (they even allow you to take pictures of the dresses! gasp!).

i'll consider this my PSA for the day. cools?



WEDDING GOWN SAMPLE SALE - Up to 80% OFF RETAIL

Take an additional 20% OFF ALL Gowns In Store! Includes labels such as Vera Wang, Monique Lhuillier, Amsale, Reem Acra & MORE!

Designer Labels Include:
Vera Wang
Monique Lhuillier
Reem Acra
Anne Barge
Amsale
Elizabeth Fillmore
Ulla Maija
Angel Sanchez
Badgley Mischka
Kenneth Pool
Justina McCaffrey
and MANY MORE!

Sale Details: Take an additional 20% OFF lowest marked price on ALL GOWNS in store. Includes recent new arrivals. Represents total savings of up to 80% OFF original retail prices!

DATE: Sale Begins Friday, Sept 26 and continues through Saturday, Oct 4
LOCATION: 114 Columbus Avenue, San Francisco, CA 94133
HOURS OF OPERATION: Saturdays, 11 a.m. to 6 p.m.
Tuesday-Friday, 11 a.m. to 7 p.m.

HURRY IN! Great deals on these one-of-a-kind designer dresses! Wedding gown sale ends Saturday, October 4.

We look forward to seeing you at our store!

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enjoy. and if you end up buying your dress there, please share with us as i like happy endings. of this nature, that is.

#377: relevant? quite.

via oh joy!.

#376: a real conversation.

*scene: at night.*

me: (brushing my teeth) DUDE. i've been using your toothbrush for the past 4 days and finally realized it this morning. so i'm back to using my toothbrush. but isn't that so gross?! we've been using the same toothbrush for 4 days! so sick. blech, barf, gag...

him: (pointing to the toothbrush in my hand/mouth) THAT is my toothbrush.

me: oh.

...

me: um...well...then WhereTF is my MIND???

*******************************************************

sorta losing it. time to eat more blueberries.

#375: polaroid-ness.

when people take something ordinary and use their creativity to make it amazing, i swoon.

i don't know about you but i could totally see either of these working (in the most wonderful way) as unique and fun invitations.


via black*eiffel.

and from a cup of jo:

via smitten.

#373: z gallerie.

i was walking through z gallerie the other day (hadn't been there in years!) and saw gorgeous, huge amber hurricanes on sale for less than $20. though they don't have the hurricanes online, i found these other goodies on their site. i especially like the last one.


$14.89


$11.89


$11.89


$4.99


$14.89

*click on prices to get details.

#372: jobs. (p.s. quite timely since i'm looking for one...)

“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” - Steve Jobs
via black eiffel.

#371: pandora.

we just recently moved. ergo the lack of posts. well, that and the fact that i have been dreaming left and right lately about the oviatt penthouse. should i call it dreaming? nightmarish is more like it. "$4500 site fee for a sunday? but it includes tables and chairs and linens!..." aka "let me justify it! i swear i can!..."

what am i doing. what am i thinking?! le sigh.

anyways, the point of this post is to introduce those of you who don't know about pandora radio...to, uh, pandora radio. we arrived on thursday to our new apartment with a couple of sleeping bags and suitcases. movers arrive on sunday so we spent most of friday cleaning and lining the kitchen cabinets. while i was breathing in all kinds of fumes from scrubbing bubbles (love this product) and contact paper, the fiance turned on some tunes courtesy the pandora site (yes, we arrived at our new place thursday night and had the cable guy scheduled for friday morning. we are not happy without our internet and tv).

pandora radio asks you to select a song or artist...and then builds a playlist with songs from the same genre...and then streams the music. it's sort of like a radio station, playing the tunes you would most likely want to hear, without commercials. for free. and if a song you don't like comes on, you can ban it...so that it is never again part of your playlist...and songs similar to the song you don't like...are also never played. it's like having a robot music mindreader friend. the more it gets to know your preferences, the more it will more likely play the songs you really like. (did that sentence make sense?)

i dunno. i think it could be a strong contender for the gaining-popularity ipod cocktail hour or reception.

p.s. fiance selected 'timbaland' because he knows i'm always willing to get my dance groove on. even while watching scrubbing bubbles do its magic and lining kitchen cabinets.

#370: reduce. reuse. recycle.

from greenfeet.

i don't think these would necessarily befit a fancy sit down dinner. but for a cocktail-themed fete or an outdoor diggity, it would be all good.

#369: milky vases and things.

from rebecca thuss.

#368: an apple a day.

from ritzy bee

reminded me of this.

#367: something pretty.

i scrolled through snippet and ink boards because i wanted to see something pretty and feel inspired.

i found a few boards that include the jewel-toned colors i've been drooling over lately.

purple and vine


under the trees




moroccan flair

and stumbled upon a new color combo (to me, anyways) that made me feel a bit of the fuzzies. totally unexpectedly.

grapefruit - gray

#366: sike. made you look.

literally moments after i thought we'd figured it out, i remembered that one of the fiance's groomsmen is expecting a baby. we were hazy on the details but after a few frantic-ish, quick emails, we found out the following:

due date...mid-february
location...australia

the groomsman and wife and new baby are planning to move back to the states sometime between april and july. and if we stick with a february date, he will definitely not be able to join us.

so...fiance and i talked it out (again...) and agreed that we really want to accommodate his friend as much as is possible.

which means...we're back to considering april 25th. should we start taking bets as to whether that date will stick? let me be the first to say that i'd happily bet against myself.

lawd.

so, last night, whilst thinking about the date changing back to april and becoming more hopeful about an outdoor affair, i drew up another guest list and stayed awake until 2 letting my mind do its crazies. i came up with a few ideas that i'll share with you on another post to get your thoughts. they're a bit outside the box and perhaps a bit etiquette-ly challenged (not unlike my grammar in this sentence) so i will definitely need your input.

but before that, i want to share with you an email exchange from last night.

fiance: When are you planning on moving back dude? I REALLY want you there.

groomsman: hard to say man. i really don't know exactly which month.... but i'd say: earliest - april/ latest - july...if you go with a date between april and july and i'm still living in oz, i'll fly in for the wedding dude. but anything earlier than april will be tough.

fiance: Ok. I really want to make this work. We're thinking April 25th. I'll let you know once this is finalized.

groomsman: cool bro. hope it works out for you...

fiance: By "work out for me" I hope you mean that you'll be there. I don't want to burden you with coming, but at the same time I just want you to know that you're one of a very small group of people I want to celebrate the occasion with me. By "bro" you are family. Love you man.

...

groomsman: can we have sex now?

#365: when fellow bloggers do the research...

...the wedding planning world is a better place.

a list from the relentless bride via blogger brides.

one more to come...after i get permission...

edit: got permission. here's the spreadsheet of all spreadsheets courtesy of budget wedding in la.

#364: a new lead.

remember this?

well, there have been a few developments since then.

1) in the past month, two close girlfriends have gotten engaged. one of them lives in boston (wedding to be in buffalo NY) and the other lives in...dublin. as in...dublin, ireland. and they're both planning to have 2009 weddings (september and august, respectively). *side note: i'm also the MOH for one of my closest friends...who's planning to get married this december. in oman. o-what, you say? oman, i said.* and the most recent news...fresh from last week...the fiance's best friend is THISCLOSE to getting engaged. and he's planning to have a march or april 2009 wedding. in korea.

um. so while you soak that in, let me give you the 2nd piece of news.

2) the couple-friend booked a venue and date. it's all set for april 11th.

2.5) given the multitude of multitudes of weddings we need to attend (6 or 7), be in (1), and throw (1) in 2009...i'd rather get our wedding pushed up to the beginning so we don't have to stress about it amidst all of the other weddings in our calendar for the year. besides, we don't want to run the risk of overlapping with fiance's best friend (who's also the best man!) and the couple-friend by sticking with april. which means...we're now seriously considering a february 2009 wedding.

3) i'm going to check out my relative's house and determine once and for all whether it could accommodate the type of wedding i want to host. i've only seen his abode once, about a year ago, and remember thinking that his pad would make an amazing party venue. i had thought about it before...but never pursued this option because i didn't want to put him in a weird position. but...fear is for dummies. and people can say no if they really want to...and he's the type who would. so, though we don't know if it'll work, i'll be visiting the house tomorrow, checking out the space, the backyard, the pool house, the patio.

guess who's crossing fingers, toes, arms, legs and eyes.

so. what do you think? february 2009 semi-backyard wedding in los angeles. ridiculously cold...? or totally do-able...? give it to me on the real.

#363: a fresh batch.

you know i get all excited about finding new lists of venues.

well i found another newish list...at event solutions. no idea about their services but i like how they've organized their location lists into various categories like "lofts" and "tasting kitchens" (which, by the way, sent me on yet another search rampage. imagine a reception held in a state-of-the-art tasting kitchen. that would be so...

fresh.)

#362: $5.75 each.

complete instructions at once wed

this is a fab two-fer. table numbers that also encourage guests to share thoughtful (and hopefully some high-larious) words of wisdom with you and your hubs.

i'd take pictures of the best (read: witty) messages and ask the photog to include them in our album. or i'd create a collage of torn-out pages and turn it into a framed piece of art for a room in our home.

WWYD?