#687: my last post.

so. what's really the best way to do this? i'm clearly not planning my wedding anymore and without any personal wedding goals, it's been tough to keep this blog going.

clearly.

i'm not very good at ending things, especially when i'm kind of like really attached. i just sulk. and think about it. and then think about it some more, knowing the inevitable, still hopeful for another outcome.

this blog has treated me kind for so long and i've been writing without pretense for a few wonderfully fun and enlightening years. can i say grateful. and super attached.

there are things i'll remember forevs. like my first post on TTO (toads clueless) and how like 500+ posts later i'd somehow become like this bonafide wedding blogger (me. bonafide. ha.)

the blogger friends out there who are some of the strongest, wittiest women i've ever met.

the loads and loads of creativity and encouragement this little world here has to offer to blogger brides.

and now i have to say goodbye? WHAT.

but this blog was about my journey, my successes and failures as i tried to plan a $10,000 wedding. and now that i've been there and done that (like 7 months ago), i don't have much to say anymore.

lame. so that said, here's the last bit.

weddings, no matter how you slice it and dice it, will tug at your heart strings and push your buttons. you're emotional because you're thinking about your families and what this shabang will mean for them, you're emotional because you're excited about the new family you're about to build, you're emotional because all of your besties are there to support you, you're emotional because there's a lot to do and you're kind of like just stressed the eff out, you're emotional because you find yourself walking that fine line between keeping everyone happy and being true to yourself...

...you're emotional because you're committing to f.o.r.e.v.e.r with that one amazing person...and want the wedding to be that kind of perfect...

it's just one day. but it's significant, you know?

so amidst the flurry, should things ever get a little hairy or overwhelming, take a step back and remember what it's all about. (hint: it's not about cake flavors or wedding dresses.)

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - maya angelou

i had to remind myself every now and then...what mattered to me, who mattered to me, and what the day itself meant to me. in the end, not everything made sense to everyone, but it absolutely made sense to me, to my husband, and to our loved ones.

and on the day of, we were fortunate enough to experience tender love, true joy, and hours of uninhibited dancing.

so this is me, wishing all of you the same and more during planning and on your wedding day.

and in life.

ok?


photo by max.

it's been real.

xo