tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post1802636812967842280..comments2024-03-19T13:23:31.645-07:00Comments on a $10,000 wedding.: #393: i'd love to stay sane.Ten Thousand Onlyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09731426268019406064noreply@blogger.comBlogger74125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-69518934048956404652009-02-26T11:58:00.000-08:002009-02-26T11:58:00.000-08:00I agree with pretty much everyone here who said th...I agree with pretty much everyone here who said that it's a cop out. If you want to exclude things from your 10k budget, then its not really a 10k budget right? <BR/><BR/>People go to your blog because they are looking for inspiration to have a $10,000 wedding. "A $10,000 Wedding, Can I do It?" Apparently you can't. Deciding to exclude items from your budget to MAKE it a 10k wedding on paper doesn't count and isn't fair to your readers.<BR/><BR/>If you look at the $2000 wedding website, she had a <B>$2000 wedding.</B> Period. Postage, lodging, rings, EVERYTHING. The only thing I would think it is okay to not include is the rings since in a way that's not really a "one day only" wedding expense, and maybe not a honeymoon (although I def wouldn't go on one if you can't afford it).<BR/><BR/>Instead of excluding things and still pretending to have a 10k wedding, why don't you just call it a 12k or 15k wedding, which would still be inspirational to a lot of people and would be honest? <BR/><BR/>"A $10,000 Wedding -Or maybe $12,000."<BR/><BR/>Or, just keep an honest tally on your side bar no matter how far over it goes. That's just my two cents.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-13172760459871197002008-11-10T10:32:00.000-08:002008-11-10T10:32:00.000-08:00Well said.Well said.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-648589979174796692008-10-18T19:03:00.000-07:002008-10-18T19:03:00.000-07:00We were planning on spending about $10,000 for our...We were planning on spending about $10,000 for our wedding next fall. But that was before I realized how much everything costs! We aren't going crazy but we still want to have a nice wedding. Our budget will end up around $12,000. Which is still not bad!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-54731100092616297772008-10-17T07:06:00.000-07:002008-10-17T07:06:00.000-07:00Oops.. I forgot to say. A friend of ours, who is n...Oops.. I forgot to say. A friend of ours, who is not a professional, will make a couple of cakes. We wanted nothing fancy, just delicious, and she is just the girl for the job. It will be her wedding gift to us. Our cakes can -and should- look homemade!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-12839668027292397872008-10-17T07:00:00.000-07:002008-10-17T07:00:00.000-07:00A few words about cost savings for a 10 000 weddin...A few words about cost savings for a 10 000 wedding.<BR/><BR/>We'll hire a caterer and have a buffet dinner. We'll hire a couple of waiters through the catering service for the dinner and the clean up after it. The alcohol will be bought by us (cheaply) and we'll make 'an open bar', so that people can get and mix their own drinks. My dream dress will be less than 500, my fiancee will use a suit he already owns. A friend is a dj. I will do my make up and my sister will do my hair. We'll get new rings made from old ones. We will not spend on a wedding night in an expensive hotel and my mum will make lunch (simple, of local produce) next day for everyone. Flower arrangements will be simple (but pretty!), we'll buy flowers from the flower farm and arrange them ourselves. We'll decorate and plan on our own (no planners or coordinators). I don't feel like I'm having to compromise anything: this is my dream wedding. If it feels like a compromise for you to stick to the original budget, then you should definitely increase!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-6983459351797218752008-10-14T04:41:00.000-07:002008-10-14T04:41:00.000-07:00Yes, things change with planning experience... I s...Yes, things change with planning experience... I started with a 8k-ish budget and ended up with a 10k wedding (110 guests, mostly family, and NOT including honeymoon). <BR/><BR/>As for your recent post about evening/daytime wedding, I'd say go for daytime! We had our afternoon reception in a park in my Vermont hometown, and it was FANtastic, lots of space for walks and frisbee throwing and happy relaxing and carefree sunshine. We didn't do dancing, but it would have been totally possible under the pavilion, and some people did spontaneously start dancing to the music. <BR/><BR/>A couple of other notes: we made our own invitations, with email/phone RSVP (no response cards) and that was TOTALLY fine. <BR/><BR/>We bought our own booze and we ended up with TONS of leftovers, but that means everybody had as much as they wanted.<BR/><BR/>My dress was $175 on sale. I fell in love with one that was $1500, but then decided to fall in love again with the other one, a sample that needed no alteration. <BR/><BR/>Also, cupcakes: no cake cutting fees!Robinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16050749288339988725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-57632559602052814142008-10-10T16:36:00.000-07:002008-10-10T16:36:00.000-07:00I JUST stumbled upon your blog (I'm new to this wo...I JUST stumbled upon your blog (I'm new to this world) and I felt like reading this entry was taking the words right outta mah mouth (or my "mouse" as my barely-english speaking mom would say).<BR/><BR/>It's not a cop out. It's reality!Lailahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04952213380240621925noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-83809586420941880782008-10-10T07:37:00.000-07:002008-10-10T07:37:00.000-07:00Yes, it is a cop out to call it a $10,000 wedding ...Yes, it is a cop out to call it a $10,000 wedding when actually it cost more. But if you can afford to spend more than who cares? If you spend $15,000 then it's a $15,000 wedding but if that's what's right for you then that's fine. You need to do whatever works for you. I think Desert Fete and Meg said it most eloquently. <BR/><BR/>Good luck, and whatever you spend it will be wonderful!carahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09351483253361159121noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-21373059812729528902008-10-09T13:17:00.000-07:002008-10-09T13:17:00.000-07:00Try winning your prize! I have a $12,000 budget an...Try winning your prize! I have a $12,000 budget and won an 8,000 dollar photography package. I enjoyed scratching that one off of my excel spreadsheet :)Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17576624040454358404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-7993890477132855092008-10-07T17:50:00.000-07:002008-10-07T17:50:00.000-07:00Cop-out or not, at least I'm not secretly jealous ...Cop-out or not, at least I'm not secretly jealous of you anymore. I've been reading your blog for months thinking "how the hell is she going to really do it all for $10k?!" Now that I see you're facing the same problems we all are, I want to call you and be your best friend! This is your blog and your wedding. You can do whatever the hell you want! Just be responsible to yourself.<BR/><BR/>My wedding budget started at $15k. Now it's $20k. And I'm okay with that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-175409284356900202008-10-07T16:10:00.000-07:002008-10-07T16:10:00.000-07:00A budget is important, but it's also important hav...A budget is important, but it's also important have a great wedding day and not stressing yourself out over every single detail. Our overall budget is significantly higher than yours, and it's not because I'm throwing money around. I am trying to get the most value out of every dollar I spend, but we also want an event that we and our friends can enjoy and not have to work through the entire way.<BR/><BR/>This whole being overly-sensible is a trend that I'm not all that into. I know the value of a dollar, mostly because growing up we didn't have any. I intend to spend what I can comfortably spend without going into debt on our wedding, and I'm going to enjoy it.Luishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09945813943336222370noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-6309210923522247212008-10-07T13:03:00.000-07:002008-10-07T13:03:00.000-07:00Don't worry about if it is a "cop out"...who cares...Don't worry about if it is a "cop out"...who cares what others think!Worry about what you can realistically afford! Do you really want to pay 2-5K extra for one day of your life?? It does not sound like you need more money...it sounds like you taste might exceed your budget riht now. I know there must be a zillion couples that have gotten married for less...one site we have down here in San Diego is called the Admiral Kidd Club...I know a bride who got married there with 125 peeps for under 10k.<BR/><BR/>Step back from the ledge, Sister!! You are about to fall into the WIC abyss!<BR/><BR/>But, seriously, I live in SD and it is quite expensive...but we are sticking to our budget...no cute letter-pressed table numbers for me!! Does it bother me...perhaps a little. But, remember that this is only one day of your life. With all your creative ideas it WILL be special!!<BR/><BR/>Get a mid-level caterer who can do an "all inclusive event". My friend Zapher Dejani offers 10k packages at his business The Abbey Catering in SD...I bet there is more than one that offers this where you are!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-2500167106550081442008-10-07T12:49:00.000-07:002008-10-07T12:49:00.000-07:00absolutely more reasonable... and even your revise...absolutely more reasonable... and even your revised is hard to do!Pretty Bridehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11923528728395200834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-12237894909629926042008-10-06T18:39:00.000-07:002008-10-06T18:39:00.000-07:00I do think everything for the day-of (ie photograp...I do think everything for the day-of (ie photography) needs to be included in the overall budget (whether that's 10k or 15) but that the honeymoon and rings can be left out of the final tally. <BR/><BR/>As far as how much you spend...you don't want to look back on the day and either feel like it wasn't what you wanted just because you arbitrarily tried to save a few grand or look back and feel like you wasted money that would have been better spent. Only you and your fiancee can decide what the balance should be. <BR/><BR/>Either way, I'm still going to read. It would be so cool to see you accomplish your original goal but I think most of us see how difficult that would be and would not want you to compromise what should be a beautiful perfect day that represents the love of you and your finacee.PurpleLimehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13167558180470884513noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-30920954019352792002008-10-06T12:44:00.000-07:002008-10-06T12:44:00.000-07:00I'm with Meg. The title of your blog shouldn't rea...I'm with Meg. The title of your blog shouldn't really be a factor in this decision. <BR/><BR/>That said dis-including certain costs from your "official number" doesn't actually make your wedding any more affordable. It's just creative accounting.<BR/><BR/>Figure out how much you feel comfortable spending and make that your budget. No one else can make that call for you.Kathrynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18292191239014356426noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-86695740502176425172008-10-06T10:20:00.000-07:002008-10-06T10:20:00.000-07:00And hey - whoever said planning forward was the wo...And hey - whoever said planning forward was the worst idea they'd ever heard - I didn't mean, figure out what the wedding you want is going to cost you, and then charge it up! I meant, figuring out what the wedding you want will really cost is a good reality check. You figure out what you want is going to cost... and say it comes in at $25K. Then you say, "Oh my gosh, that's totally not something I can afford. What am I willing to sacrifice? What can I afford?" and work backwards from there.<BR/><BR/>I just think when you set a arbitrary number (you set $10K a long time ago as a magic number for you) you can spend a lot of time trying to cram everything into that number, and thinking "I don't understand why this isn't working!" Well, it might not be working, because it might be a $25K wedding you are trying to plan. Working forward will help you figure that out.<BR/><BR/>We started by figuring out exactly how much we could/felt comfortable spending, and then we made that number work. Not everyone works that way, but it was good for us. And since you picked 10K long before you got engaged (and hey before the economy tanked) that might, or might not be a number that actually works for you now.<BR/><BR/>All I'm saying is you need to figure out what the wedding you want costs, and then figure out what you can afford. After that, you'll be in better shape to make compromises to get those numbers fit together. The title of your blog shouldn't be a factor.Meghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09526722516550185150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-60535536795716214342008-10-06T09:48:00.000-07:002008-10-06T09:48:00.000-07:00I have to say I'm torn. I was (and will) root for...I have to say I'm torn. I was (and will) root for you. But I'm sure it's possible to have a 10k wedding with all the perks. Hey what are friends for? You must know someone that can Dj for you, a friend which takes amazing pics, that can get the alcohol a lot cheaper. Go ahead dig, research and recruit your friends and try not to let it get to you and ruined your initial plans. Go for the 10K!!!!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17091367059208266395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-21034881377650969822008-10-06T09:14:00.000-07:002008-10-06T09:14:00.000-07:00NOT a cop-out! Moderation in all things! Do what y...NOT a cop-out! Moderation in all things! Do what you want to do, create a wedding you will love, GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK!!!!Maggiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04548578181174543021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-74887633855344430562008-10-06T08:42:00.000-07:002008-10-06T08:42:00.000-07:00This makes me think of Rich Bride, Poor Bride (the...This makes me think of Rich Bride, Poor Bride (the show on TLC if no one's ever heard of it)<BR/><BR/>You give your initial budget to the planner, if you go over by a little not a big deal. If you can plan an event you're happy with for around $10 000 (not to the dime..) $12 000 give or take, you're still in the clear! <BR/><BR/>But anyways, who cares what people think!! You started this blog for yourself. If you need to change your outlook on the budget, change it. What are going to do... hunt you down? Good god no! <BR/><BR/>Are any of your friends photographers? Idea for you: I take photography on the side and have been doing weddings as wedding gifts for my friends for a while now. I can't afford to give them expensive gifts, so I offer to do their photos/wedding albums (maybe you have a friend like me?) this saves them $4 000 in the long run. <BR/><BR/>Side note: I very much enjoy your blog btw, I'm not going to quit on you because you went over budget. ;)DOMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00625685698817015732noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-15322242609369802342008-10-06T08:37:00.000-07:002008-10-06T08:37:00.000-07:00As for what to re-name your blog, cop out or no co...As for what to re-name your blog, cop out or no cop out, whatever. It is your wedding, and really you owe the internet world nothing. Do what works for you and what makes you happy, we will live (and keep reading :) ) <BR/>I wanted to comment on the "what's in... what's out" idea. We are having a "$10,000" wedding too... but not really because Bryan's mom is paying for the flowers... I guess I should add those in :) Also, we are paying for certain things ourselves that will last forever, and aren't just for the big day. Our rings, gifts for each other and the friends standing up front with us, honeymoon, my shoes... And probably more along the way. The most important thing is that we have good food and drink for our guests, so if that means I pay the $40 for Save The Date supplies and don't send my mom the receipt, then thats what happens. All in all, we will come in under $15,000 for sure... an Orange County wedding, 100 people, during the day, cocktail reception only. Weddings are crazy I tell you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-25470488448530045752008-10-06T07:32:00.000-07:002008-10-06T07:32:00.000-07:00I think you can still do it. We are having 100 gue...I think you can still do it. We are having 100 guests and using one of the best (and unfortunately most expensive) caterers. However, we are having a cocktail reception. Great food but small bites. The total for the food and drinks is $5020.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-67913204286089600392008-10-05T14:17:00.000-07:002008-10-05T14:17:00.000-07:00We are also planning a 10,000 wedding. We are sav...We are also planning a 10,000 wedding. We are saving on alcohol but buying cases of Trader Joes Charles Shaw wine (less than $40 for 12 bottles), but that does require a venue that lets you serve your own alcohol. Also, we have a winter wedding, so we are also serving an alcoholic wassail, where several bottles of rum can go a very long way. Just some suggtions on the alcoholAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-48797329511689886532008-10-05T12:24:00.000-07:002008-10-05T12:24:00.000-07:00To have my dress, photography, invites, venue, etc...To have my dress, photography, invites, venue, etc. and stay between 10-15 we cut people. It's, unfortunately, the thing that has to happen. We went from 95 to 62 on an A list with 17 on the B list. (The taxes and charges are absolute killers and are putting us over the 10K no matter what we do).<BR/><BR/>We also decided on a Friday night cocktail reception with the ceremony beforehand. We're getting everything we want but just on a smaller scale. And I'm actually feeling much more relieved about the whole thing. And I'm not feeling guilty at all. Anyone who wants you to be happy is going to understand that there is only so much you can afford without going into massive debt as you start a new life. I can't imagine anyone would make you feel badly for making that tough decision. Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-91647474256009211042008-10-05T11:45:00.000-07:002008-10-05T11:45:00.000-07:00Have you thought about forgoing the traditional bi...Have you thought about forgoing the traditional big wedding in favor of smaller, city-hall style nuptials? You seem to be putting a high priority on the party aspect of this event and that might be more easily achieved by only inviting people to a big party.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7906032051076130258.post-24004461593733765112008-10-04T22:45:00.000-07:002008-10-04T22:45:00.000-07:00i know that things may be diffcult as it may seem ...i know that things may be diffcult as it may seem but i truly want to see your 10k wedding possible. if getting money elsewhere,like family and friends, is a big no no. try doing something like a car wash or some sort of to help you out with some things. sure you might not get everything you want but be sure to not cheap out for your ring. you will be wearing it for the rest of your lives so maybe that can be not a part of your budget. photography, try looking for friends with connections there can be possible discounts there. and if need be. if you're invites aren't yet made result to cutting up your own cardstock paper and doing something yourself with stamps, glitter, and some ribbons. with some creativity anything can be possible. and as a side note: try to relax. too much stress will make it hard to thing outside the box.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com